Category Archives: Food

Inadequate toasters

I’ve recently moved into a new houseshare. Not just new to me – new to all the people I’m living with. It was let as semi-furnished, so had a couple of fridges and a cooker, but no kettle or toaster. For a few days I made do with using the grill to make toast, but after several very-nearly-burnt-despite-standing-in-the-kitchen-with-it scenarios, a toaster was in order. As I bought the kettle, one of my housemates was going to buy the toaster. But being French, he was unaware of a major problem which must surely be causing distress right across the UK. Continue reading Inadequate toasters

Mr Fussy’s Marmalade

“One man’s (albeit slightly late) foray into cooking food more interesting than oven chips and beans on toast” – old strapline, 2007.

This blog didn’t exist 4 years ago.

What did though, was a food blog I started called “Mr Fussy’s Marmalade”. The basic premise is that I went through most of my teenage years not wanting to try new food. At some point in my mid 20’s, I had nothing else much going on in my life, so figured I’d try some of the foods I’d never eaten before while (sorta) learning to cook. It contained almost no pictures (which is a bit odd for a food blog, isn’t it?) ran for about 20 posts, then I got bored, and my mind wandered off onto other things (I’m still not a very good cook).

I’ve finally got around to adding those posts to this blog though (I’m not selling this very well, am I?), so if you fancy reading the sort of crap I was typing 4 years ago, then check out the new OLD category: Mr Fussy’s Marmalade.

The oldest post in that category explains it better than I’ve just done above (and also why it’s called “Mr Fussy’s Marmalade”).

“Jesus! How much?!”

No, I’m not hiring a prostitute to roleplay as Jesus (there’s a disturbing thought). No, this was my reaction, after I walked into a chip shop 10 minutes ago, considered the pre-fried items relaxing in the “magic-warm-box” section (including some battered fish and a variety of non-battered sausages), and went “I’ll have the fish and chips”.

Immediately, they start on the upsell. “Large fish and chips, sir?” Continue reading “Jesus! How much?!”

Weird Kitchen Stuff

This blog post by Graham Nunn about flawed logos by kitchen textile companies reminded me of a weird label I’d seen on something in a kitchenware shop, last year.

Here it is:

Attached to a sieve

Is Marisa Laurito a magician from the 1980s, who has branched out into cookware?

The thing she has in her hand looks like a cross between a soldering iron (another area she could target, perhaps?) and a shrunken turkey baster. But this tag is on a sieve?

I can see that to save money, you might have one picture that goes on all products. But in this case, wouldn’t you choose something like a whisk or a wooden spoon (or even a sieve!), more instantly recognisable as something used in cooking? I mean what is that thing? An oven thermometer? A screwdriver? Should it have sparks shooting out the end of it, or is this a good moment to utilise that lifetime warranty?

Even the angle she’s holding it at, is weird. And so close to her face, like a pipette in a school science class, that she’s about to squirt up her nose for fun. It doesn’t say cookware to me.