…Pretty though.
Category Archives: Daily Life
Ice Cream Boobs
Opened some ice cream. Lid seems rude.
Yes, I ate some before taking the picture. It’s a photo #fail, partly.
The pattern on the ice cream matched the lid.
Weird Flytipping in the Snow
Spotted in Redland.
Thought it looked odd.
Photography exhibition
I went to this, this evening.
Very interesting. You should go too.
Its free and on for a week and a half, on Baldwin Street, Bristol.
BT – Embarrassing Typo
Just got a bill from BT, and as usual they include a book advertising all their other products.
I don’t think much to my new usage allowance.
It’s not gonna take me very long to use 40Mb.
Ben Park – Guest Blogger – Online Dating
I’ve just written a blog post. It’s not hosted here though, because I was invited to write a guest entry, on a blog belonging to April Browne.
Exciting, eh!?
A week and a bit ago, she wrote a blog about her experiences of online dating, and after reading, I started writing a comment. It was a comment that was so long, April said I should write a guest entry on her blog. So I did.
Here it is: http://thislass.com/online-dating
It’s all about my opinions and experience of online dating. Enjoy.
11th of the 11th
So it seems that according to the time on Twitter’s tweets, Lord Alan Sugar might have accidentally tweeted during the 2 minute silence today. After announcing that he was going to partake in 2 tweet-less minutes.
In fairness to Lord Sugar, I’ve spoken at least twice during the 2minute silence, in the past.
A few years back, I was in a call centre job. They didn’t mention the silence, I wasn’t entitled to a break, and when a call came through at the start of the silence, what was I meant to do? Hang up?
We had the fire alarm go off during a call once, and the caller couldn’t have sounded less interested when I told him I might have to go, as the building was on fire. Turns out it wasn’t. It was a drill. But I wasn’t going to sit there and continue helping him with his Internet problem, from a potential inferno.
I’d like to think the 999 call operators these days do two silences, so the ones working get a chance to take part.
But the worst one was when I was at college.
I went to college in Swindon, and one day I was running phenomenally late. To mark the start of the silence, some people fired a gun.
My first instinct wasn’t “oh yeah…today’s that day”.
My first reaction was to duck down, like I was cowering from an explosion. This was accompanied by “FUCK ME! What the hell was…”
At this point my gaze met with that of a disapproving pensioner, staring at me, as normal people went about their business, silently.
I tagged on a few seconds to the end of my own personal silence like a penalty that had been imposed.
Wonder if anyone reading this has done worse than shouting profanities in the middle of Swindon?
The Package Trip – Day 7
Our final day, before we fly back in the morning.
Yesterday in the Internet cafe, we had checked for more information on the land train. Sadly, it only went to places we had already visited.
Bummer.
My girlfriend suggested we could take a boat to Formentera, this nearby island. Apparently it’s unspoilt beaches, hardly touched.
Yes, why not.
I thought no more about it until we boarded the boat this morning.
I’m not a natural sailor. Or swimmer.
In fact, it’s fair to say that I have a healthy fear of drowning.
Never mind eh?
We’d Googled Formentera, and it’s not far from Ibiza. 4km, from memory.
I mean I could probably walk 4km in half an hour, and surely the boat goes faster than me walking.
How long can it take?
Over an hour.
Nearly an hour and a quarter, of me, sat on the top deck of a catamaran, freezing, with my girlfriend trying to relax me.
FINALLY, we arrived at the island. Very nice it is too.
Not quite unspoilt really – there’s an Eroski (a chain here) supermarket, lots of cars, and cycle paths.
We rented two bikes for the day for the princely sum of €10. Dynamo lights (not that we’d be out in the dark) and a lock included. No deposit taken, and they gave us a free map.
We set off for some nice cycling, seeing lots of wildlife, down lots of country lanes. I saw lots of lizards (there are apparently rare blue lizards there, but the best I saw was green), various birds, rabbits, sheep. Then we happened upon a couple doing yoga, completely naked. That isn’t a euphemism. They were doing yoga. Stretching, etc., naked.
Well you don’t see that every day.
We got lost down some country lanes, checked our map and realised we were never going to get anywhere interesting in that direction with the time we had, then made for a nice beach near(ish) the marina.
Unspoilt, save for rubbish bins, and a wheelchair access board, which is completely inaccessible by wheelchair. See:
No shops, no bars, no other people.
Crystal clear water too.
Soon enough it was time to catch the boat back.
Now, if I didn’t enjoy the boat across, travelling to a magical unspoilt island, you can imagine how much I liked the same journey, backwards to our hotel, with more wind, and more waves.
For the longest hour of my life, I gripped the table with one hand, my girlfriend’s hand with the other, my feet stuck hard against the floor, my spine forced painfully into the back of my seat. I kept my eyes closed and focused on my breathing, and trying not to fight the rhythm of the waves.
Normal people, with better sea legs than me wandered about, up and down the stairs, to the bar, the toilet.
My girlfriend asked me on more than one occasion if I wanted the carrier bag to be sick in.
Somehow, I managed the hour and a quarter back. I wasn’t even sick.
Sadly, the mini-cold I’ve picked up while here has finally taken control of my voice and I can hardly speak. Hopefully a good night’s sleep will fix that.
The Package Trip – Day 2
Amendment to yesterday: it isn’t as expensive as I first thought.
Today I discovered our hotel (and directly around it for a street or so) is quite abnormally expensive.
Venturing a bit further we discovered a few Spar shops (there are loads – it’s like the equivalent of Tesco Express in the UK) where prices are much lower.
500ml of water at our hotel bar is €2.
Spar sells 1.5l bottles of the same brand of water for €0.65. Bargain.
Saw an advert on tv for a budget supermarket which packages things very plainly (ala Tesco Value), but haven’t tried there yet.
The water thing is handy, because although we’re half board (and so get breakfast and evening meal included), the evening meal doesn’t come with a drink.
There’s all-you-can-drink tea, coffee and orange squash at breakfast, but not even water free in the evening. Odd.
We thought we’d save some money this lunchtime and have a picnic. Quite tricky really.
Cheese isn’t available in small amounts, and we don’t have a fridge to keep it in. That also rules out yoghurts (only really in packs of four or above), fruit juice, or anything else that needs to be chilled.
I joked that the Cheddar cheese probably wasn’t from Cheddar (if you’ve seen that Channel4 moaning food programme recently, you’ll appreciate that), only to find out it practically was. A farm in Somerset, listed right there on the back. Curiously orange colour though.
Chocolate seems very expensive still. Cheapest I found any today was still about €0.80. Comparatively, you can buy a huge bag of crisps for €0.65, so it isn’t an “unhealthy tax” or anything.
Also saw at least two bars of Cadbury’s chocolate which I’ve never seen in the UK. I had no idea they had non-UK products that they sold around the world.
The meeting with our rep went well. He’s not at all pushy, seems quite friendly. Very camp.
He mentioned that you can hire a car for about €40. Sadly, being overly worried about getting them stolen, neither me nor my girlfriend bought our driving licences with us, so that’s a bit of a #fail.
There is a land train – of the sort you get up/down Weston Pier – which does 3 hour excursions. It drives down main roads and everything. I’m almost tempted purely for the bizarre-factor.
If I take away one thing from this trip, so far, it’ll be how much one culture merges with another.
My tv was advertising Hannah Montana a few hours ago.
There’s a KFC and Pizza Hut within walking distance.
In a corner shop earlier, the cashier counted the change back to us in a very British manner.
Spar sell Dorset Cereal bars. And Heinz ketchup.
This afternoon I walked past a sign essentially offering “Cash for Gold”.
Quite amazing how international everything is. I’m surprised you can’t get Colon washing powder in the UK though – for that really really deep clean.
The Package Trip – Day 1
Today I went on holiday. I’m there right now. In a hotel. Somewhere else in Europe. They speak Spanish (and are also fluent in English).
I’m typing on an iPhone into the WordPress app, ready to take advantage of international data roaming. 2010, it is.
This is only the second time in my life I’ve ever been on a package holiday. The first was a Club 18-30 holiday that a friend won in a competition (which he didn’t remember entering because he was drunk at the time), and invited me along.
It was almost exactly like you imagine. Chavs, and a knackered old coach from the airport, which must have done a complete lap of every other hotel in Corfu, before finally arriving at ours. Then the early start next morning (after very little sleep) to try and get you drunk on Ouzo, and to sell you excursions.
I upset one rep on the first day by telling her I couldn’t afford all the events she was flogging, and that I could get drunk without her help. We bought three in the end because my friend fancied her. Two were a complete waste of money.
Then we upset most of the other Club 18-30 holidaymakers before lunch, by going to the bar and, while they took a Budweiser and sat down, me and my friend ordered a tea and a coffee.
The bartender seemed excited at the prospect of doing something other than opening another bottle, and proclaimed that he was about to make a really good cappuccino. The bartender really went out of his way.
He took ages.
I don’t know if you’ve ever held up a queue of chavs desperate to get drunk, while ordering a cappuccino and tea, but it’s an uncomfortable feeling.
We bought a kettle from a nearby supermarket and made our own from that point on.
Anyway, let’s see if this holiday is going better than that one, shall we?
Nice things:
– Taxi to airport was early, driver not too chatty (it was really early – far too early for talking).
Last package trip: long drive to London. This holiday wins.
– Thomson staff are very professional and helpful, when there was a problem (see below).
Last package holiday: our main hotel rep (not the one I upset) was arrested, then deported, a couple of months after my trip, for fellating a man on a public, family beach, during a drinking game.
– Off the plane, pretty quick onto a (nice, air conditioned) coach, and away. At our hotel in under 30mins.
Last package trip: ages in a bus that looked like it hadn’t been serviced since before I was born.
– Other people staying at our hotel are quite nice/friendly. Chatted briefly to several, and they’re nice. They are somewhat older than us, though. At a guess, I’d say the average age is about 55. Maybe slightly higher.
Last package trip: they were 90% complete idiots (if not higher).
Bad things:
– Showing on the screens during our flight was Glee, followed by a James May documentary about space travel. Glee is irritating as hell.
I like James May, but a documentary looking at the history of flight inevitably includes a “things don’t always go right” section, that reminds you that when flight goes wrong, it REALLY goes wrong.
I was a bit nervous as I haven’t been on a plane in such a long time.
Last package holiday: flight showed several episodes of My Family. I think that’s a draw.
– We’d paid for breakfast, my girlfriend had specified vegetarian, but they didn’t have her down as such. Hence she got a meat-included one, and enjoyed a nice bread roll, orange juice and cup of tea.
– Sadly, I actually got the breakfast I ordered. It’s been so long since I’ve been on a plane, I’d forgotten how horrible airline food is.
They just over overcomplicate it.
When it’s 7:45am and I’ve been up since 4, after about 2 hours sleep, what I want is maybe a chocolate croissant and cup of tea.
So given that everyone else was in a similar situation, and the limited cooking facilities they must have to heat food, why do they aim so insanely high?
They attempted tomatoes, omelette, sausage, and bacon-potato rostis.
I know that, because it was stamped on the outside of the foil packet it came in.
I managed about half the sausage. Tried the rest but it was all pretty grim.
I also enjoyed a bread roll, some orange juice and cup of tea.
And considering the time I spent at the airport, I could have eaten actual food there.
Last package holiday flight food: just as grim. Must remember to refuse flight meals on next trip.
– Everything seems quite expensive.
There are vending machines here selling 500ml of water for €2.
The exchange rate at the moment makes that nearly £2. For a 500ml bottle of water?
To put that in perspective, a UK motorway services charge about £1.30 for that.
Standard bar of chocolate is about €1.50.
I saw an English version of today’s Daily Mail earlier for €2. That’s at least €2 too much.
Last package trip: water was, if anything, cheaper than UK supermarkets. However, Corfu’s tap water is definitely undrinkable, and there are street fountains here now. I guess if everyone in the country uses something, it gets cheaper.
Anyway I should get to sleep. It’s been a very long day, and there’s a meeting tomorrow morning to sell us excursions…